In the week leading up to Thanksgiving, I felt torn. Full of awareness of all I have been given. Heavy with gratefulness for this moment, these people, this grace. Yet grieving this changed life. This never-can-go-back reality. Tossed between cherishing this moment and fearing the moments to come.

So maybe I was a little distracted. And maybe I shouldn’t have started a major project two days before Thanksgiving. Maybe I shouldn’t have waited to make the pies until 5 a.m. on Thanksgiving morning. But I did and it was all right–they were beautiful (in an artsy, non-perfectionist kind of way.)

Before the meal, my husband read Psalm 100 as he always does. And then around the table with our spoken blessings, and there were beautiful words and many tears. And we were thankful.

After the meal, we cut the pie in big slices and added whipped cream. And really, it wasn’t until you took a bite that you realized the pumpkin pie was missing something–something major. I had forgotten to put the sugar in the pumpkin pie. I was more distracted than I thought.

Lesson 1: Sometimes we’re going to fail. Sometimes we’re going to try our best and it won’t be enough. Sometimes we will disappoint others. Often we will disappoint ourselves. Failure isn’t only an option, it’s a guarantee. Because we are fallen people. We are made in God’s image, but we are not God. We are constantly falling short of God’s glory, and we are constantly being reminded that we are not enough, that we need to be rescued.

The wonderful news is that we have a Rescuer. We don’t have to be enough. We can trust in Someone who never changes, never fails. We can lean hard into the saving power of Christ.

My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. Psalm 73:26

He is able to save to the uttermost those who draw near to God through Him. Hebrews 7:25

Lesson 2: It’s the inside that matters. When they were in the oven, the pies smelled wonderful. While sitting on the counter, they filled every expectation. It wasn’t until the first bite that we realized they were deficient–that they were not what they were supposed to be.

When the hard times come, we need a heart of truth. We need a heart that has sought God, a heart that has found Him. We need a heart that knows Him. It won’t be enough that we can say the right words. It won’t matter what we look like or where we are–what will matter is what we believe.

What we feed our soul–it matters. What our heart is holding on to–it makes a difference. What fills up the nooks and crannies of our mind–it changes us.

What we love makes us who we are.

Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life. Proverbs 4:23

Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. Deuteronomy 6:5