Grief is a winding path. It is not just one good-bye but rather a thousand good-byes. That first crashing wave just keeps lapping against the sand.
It’s not just good-bye to breath, good-bye to warmth. It’s good-bye to all the would-have-beens. Good-bye to morning greetings and good-night hugs. Good-bye to shopping trips and coffee dates. Good-bye to wedding plans and babies and laughing together. Good-bye to birthdays and conversations and long walks. Good-bye to living and loving and sharing.
Good-bye to her smile, her zeal, her joy. Her friendship. Her love. Her presence.
Grief is a thousand good-byes.
I keep remembering the hellos. Oh, the joy of saying hello to her.
Hello, heartbeat. Hello, miracle. Hello, curly-headed sunshine.
Hello, exuberant child. Hello, funny and energetic teenager. Hello, beautiful and gifted woman.
Hello, warrior. Hello, lover of God. Hello, faith hero.
Grief is the ending of hellos. That is what takes your breath away, and that is what hurts your heart.
So many good-byes. No more hellos.
Our family is reading a book about heaven together. It is like a whole new realm that I have never really thought about. It is comforting in ways I cannot tell. There is a fullness added to life, and the circle comes together finally. The journey’s end–how I begin to long for it. How I begin to joyfully consider what is ours in Christ.
How I long to know the tender heart of the One who loves so well and prepares such a place. The One who gave His life so that we could go there and be with Him forever.
The One who is our eternal refuge. The One who holds Marissa safe.
Safe in the place where all our good-byes will someday be turned back to hello.
For here we have no lasting city, but we seek the city that is to come. Hebrews 13:14
And He who was seated on the throne said, “Behold, I am making all things new.” Revelation 21:5
Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Romans 5:1-2