There are moments we never forget. Moments of struggle and moments of surrender and moments of sweet peace. Pain and beauty and joy.
I remember the sunny July day I wore a white dress and said yes to a lifetime promise. I remember driving in the rusted car away from all that was known to something distant and unsure, heart beating fast as the miles rolled by. I remember our first home and the hand-made curtains and the growing up. So much growing up in that little place. There were years without children and fear that they would never come. But then they came and I remember.
I remember the miracles.
I remember life then. Sweet and simple. Babies and toddlers and small ones. Tripping over toys and never getting enough sleep and holding hands. Laughter and spilled milk and Good-night Moon.
And we were blessed.
There was heart-ache, too. I remember my Daddy’s last breath and twin babies who fell asleep before they saw the sun and a prodigal boy. And all the normal hard, all the daily hard of living and loving.
I remember a curly-headed young woman, just waking up to a beautiful life, sitting on a table and being told she had cancer. I remember falling hard into this valley we’re still walking in.
I remember pain and wet tears and struggling to stand.
But what I remember most is God’s faithfulness. The miracle of a changed and growing heart. The forgiveness of my deepest sin. The guiding hand to lead our way. The assurance of His covenant love. Learning His heart and opening mine to Him. Being held in the palm of His hand.
His faithfulness in all of it.
I remember. I will never forget. For all my days and in every moment, I remember.
I remember the days of old; I meditate on all that you have done; I ponder the work of your hands. Psalm 143:5